These rough boards simply explain a personal adaptation stage where you depart from a pattern of life, arrive to a new city. First you feel very small, the city intimidates you with it’s glory. You meet new characters/experiences, life goes on. You try to adapt. You insist on trying to be big inside but you still carry that feeling. You try to forget about past, present, future. Then you think you’ve adapted but sometimes you feel homesick for a place that doesn’t even exist. You move along with the flow. And you give up and grow and stay the same. You continue to the pattern of next chapter.